So part of my job is to upload a video everyday and as much as I think I can always find fresh content, it's pretty tough with a busy schedule.I have come to rely on a few different sites, but the best has got to be http://youtube-trends.blogspot.com/


YouTube's very own blogspot. It picks out the most shared videos and highlights them in a lovely little blog

It's made me bum the internet so much more

Fit Birds

I was reading about vultures after a phone conversation with my friend Dave led to a dispute over pigeons. He thought carrier pigeons were called passenger pigeons. I thought that sounds like nonsense I also had the internet and checked, expecting to find no valid entries for passenger pigeons. Interestingly passenger pigeons did exist but are now extinct, and no they didn't carry passengers or stuff for humans (like carrier pigeons did and still do) as far as I know. Wikipedia them here. It's a sad dodoesque sort of story.

As an attempt to move on from the passenger pigeon debaucle Dave dropped a bit more unsubstantiated knowledge. This time about vulture behaviour, sort of implying that they have ESP and that's how they all gather around a kill from miles away. This may or may not be the case my Google Search found nothing relevant in the first 2 minutes and I sort of gave up, but it did lead to the discovery of this cool safari safety fact.

A sort of safari safety picture.

As the above image shows, if vultures in Africa are sitting in trees around a fresh kill, even if it at first appears to be unattended there is usually a large predator in the vicinity. So DO NOT approach to try and cut a steak off the zebra because Simba has grown up and is now the Lion King and he WILL eat you.

On the subject of lions I was in Cornwall surfing and after my lovely surf at Widemouth Bay we went to a pub in Bude and had a few drinks and discussed cupping. For anybody who doesn't know, cupping is the sort of cup shape you make with your hand when you are cupping something, such as a boob.

It was unanimously decided that the best cupping scene in all of film history was... 

The Lion King - monkey cups lion's bum.

 

A text-book cub-cup. This cup can be found at 2:49 and lasts for a mere 2.5 secs but the epic soundtrack that precedes and follows this particular cup puts it up there as the best movie cup of all time. The cupping sound effect is also so self-assured and confident, a true marvel of recording.

As a bonus fact, this is an actual translation of what the African bloke is shouting at the beginning of the tune.

Nants ingonyama bagithi Baba  [Here comes a lion, Father]
Sithi uhm ingonyama           [Oh yes, it's a lion]

Nants ingonyama bagithi baba  [Here comes a lion, Father]
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama         [Oh yes, it's a lion]
Ingonyama                     [Lion]

Siyo Nqoba                    [We're going to conquer]
Ingonyama                     [Lion]
Ingonyama nengw' enamabala    [A lion and a leopard come to this open place]

I never particularly wandered what he was shouting but now I know, and it seems pretty sweet.

hot fruit

Melt Banana are pretty Japanesey. Apparently they've been around for ages. It appears that John Peel was a bit of a fan and described them as "the best live band I've seen since Captain Beefheart". They've got a few live videos, most tend to be sub-par sound quality. I did however, quite like their cover of Blondie's Heart of Glass. Defo worth a search.

Melt Banana are:

Refreshingly Energised...

Now I'm not totally against the concept of policing  (like perhaps the NWA were) but here's a list of my most recent encounters. It's truly inspiring work they do...

1. Had my bike stolen and so reported it, they said: "I wouldn't hold your breath if I were you".
2. Got pick pocketed and so reported it, they said: "I don't suspect we'll find who did this".
3. Got stopped whilst cycling over a perfectly safe junction and was threatened with a fine! the cheek. Never there when you need them, but all too present when you don't.
4. Got stopped whilst drunk on my bike outside a pub, with my friend sitting on the handle bars. They asked if we were drunk, we said "yep". So at this point they tried pulling my leg by saying "the bikes been reported stolen" I said "what!?" they said "yeah we're gona have to confiscate it til you can find a receipt".(cue some chortles from the officers) Funny buggers.

Still... I managed to slip a comedy "fuck off" into the conversation but it was filled with such a bitter and genuine sub-text, which they didn't even remotely pick up on. So who's laughing now officer!!!??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

And I'll be laughing all the way to Liverpool St. Station, where I shall be filling out forms for and paying for a replacement Young Persons Railcard, stolen in incident number 2.

Here is an epic personal battle between man & machine. I like the bit where he starts to ride upside down.

 

enjoy.

What would you do with multiple audio tracks on youtube?

I was listening to an LCD soundsystem track live on Jools Holland (on youtube), the vocals were a little bit low in the mix. Wouldn't it be good you could turn them up in relation to the band?

It would mean recording & uploading multiple audio files with each video, but with the internet being rapid these days, that shouldn't be a problem.

You could just tell youtube how much volume from each part you wanted, so the original upload was big, but the download was the same size, just in a smarter version, using youtube as the server to host them all...

Possibly an awesome idea and I hope some smart bastard makes it happen. Just like some smart bastard choreographed this bunch at sea world Florida.

So good!

MASSIVE overhaul (relatively speaking)

Ok, so I've been quiet of late, my one follower can vouch for that. But that's not a problem, I've been ok, I've been more than ok, I've been surfing around the Southern Hemisphere and moving to London. All good but irrelevant. Fact is I'm gona change my blog subject a bit, from "in-store music" to just music and things relating to music.

On a river!? I know, it's nuts.

So a close friend of mine "David Al Hilali" or (dauwd) in pretentious speak,  has been a busy bee, finally finishing his engineering degree and working on some great tunes. It's the most wonderful, melodic and creative electronic music that I'm aware of at the moment. Before you ask, NO, I'm not up to speed on electronic music, the travelling and surfing doesn't bode well for new electronic music discovery. Apart from maybe if you were travelling and surfing in Germany where you can surf on a river in Munich and probably head straight to an awesome techno club. But I didn't do that, I went to Bali and listened to J.Lo featuring pitbull and some reggae.

As a young-un his much more talented brothers had already laid claim to the standard instruments most kids learn, so he spent his time in the Welsh country side (as all, half Welsh, half Iraqi children really should do) fiddling with electronic samples on fruity loops; a loop-based music programme .

Dave (centre) the bad apple.

He was probably a lovely child, but by the time I met him at uni, Dave was a textbook bad apple (person) ready to rot his fellow orchard (friends). Together, we shared an amazingly fun few, hedonistic and apple-rotting years at Uni. His room was both a social and musical hub for a group of us. There was a Withnail & I sort of set up with our good friend/guy in the next room Wyn ;short for Wyndham, lovely name, lovely guy and Welsh for winding road. A constant smoky haze was the order of the day. A stream of creative and entertaining people were always passing through his room in the uni halls. Digeridoos, guitars, bongos, synths and microphones cluttered the tiny living space making for one of the most self indulgent muso times that anyone could possibly hope for.

On Bold St. Liverpool eating a creative subway.

He never really did much more on fruity than a 16-bar loop (normally just 4) which he edited as he went along on the fly, making for very intriguing, creative progressions with beautiful build-ups and drop-ins, that suited both the post-chibuku clubnight sessions and the chilled weekday afternoons down to a T. His downfall, at the time at least, was always with structures. A lot of people could always see the potential in his music and a few of us sensible ones always urged him to do some actual tracks.

I personally think he found it either dull or difficult (probably a combo of the two) and didn't want to work on it, but with  maturity and plenty of time on his hands, that focus on creating whole pieces has come through. What we are left with now on soundcloud fills me with joy. Dauwd has just released his first single through pictures music a track called "Could it be", my answer to that is yes, yes it could be and I think a great few years lie ahead for dauwd.

They can also get it spot on. (pt.2 of the rant)

An effective use of music
Now, there are examples of good instore/restaurant/bar music. You can appeal to a crowd. For example. Shoreditch, Hoxton, some areas of North London. Even the shops – Urban Outfitters, Topshop... you are helping customers  feel as if they are keeping it ‘retro’, and being ‘different’ (even though their parents were probably there first). Yet at least these places are pulling a crowd. They have their identity, and it’s all about the music. They have their dedicated punters. They are selling business. Damn, those people probably listen to that music at home. It’s just something that makes them feel at ease. It’s a genre. It’s popular. It’s what they want.  

YES!!!

20/20 vision just a pair of empty frames I love my life as a d***head!

So loud music can in the right context help spending, Smith and Curnow (1996) manipulated the volume of music in two stores so that they played either softly or loudly . Their results found the average number of sales per minute increased with the volume of the music. 

The proof is in the pudding, Felipe Verde, or Philip Green in English, is Britains 9th richest man, and he owns loads of shops that do well. Proof, pudding. done.

Music serving a purpose in lifts (not really stores I know)

The music is how you need it to be, given that situation....you’re in a tiny metal box either plummeting or ascending at a considerable speed. The music puts you at ease. This is entirely necessary...It takes your mind off the fact that you’re in a tiny metal box, either plummeting or ascending at a considerable speed!

Lift music is commonly referred to as Muzak. I'm not sure if this man knows what Muzak rhymes with?

MUZAK is called Muzak because of the Muzak corporation, who were set up in the 40's by an army man to assist in the war effort, they worked out the positive effect music had on employees and rates of production. Originally this Muzak consisted of the popular tunes of the day, but very quickly it turned into a science, and some of that indistinct music you refer to as elevator music, is classic Muzak, but we tend to notice it more in elevators than in the many other places it is played.

Now Nick thinks it serves a purpose, I on the other hand absolutely cherish those awkward silences that you can only get in quiet lifts. The little nod back of the head as an acknowledgement to the other person that you know they are there, and the little nodback you get in reply, then the twiddling and looking around as you wait forever for the doors to close. It's a beautiful thing.

They can get it SOOOO wrong (Pt.1 of the Nick rant)

People are going to have different views on using music, so starting close to home I asked my friend Nick a Music graduate, originally from London, currently in New Zealand to give me his view on the subject. What I got was a two part fantastically colourful and opinionated rant about how he hates Nickelback, Jack(blander than a breadstick)Johnson, rave culture in relation to t-shirt sales and Rihanna.

My first thoughts were, cheer up Nick, Rihanna and Jack Johnson are alright and we all love the odd dance. But alas Nick is a consumer of things, and as a consumer he ventures into places that sell consumables. The music these places play may affect how often he ventures in to consume the consumables from them. He has rights, consumer rights so let's read his angry words...

1. Music being overplayed. This is a valid issue that can frustrate staff members and customers alike, Nickelback are used as an example. 

   

   Jesus Christ! you might regret that

   
   
   If I hear you one more time in the pub, I may glass someone. Or glass myself... Looking so much like Jesus (Chad - the singer) , you should have a moral obligation to make sure that there is no harm done to your fellow man.
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
2. Ill fitting, loud and over the top music. Supre is an Australian shop selling cheap t-shirts, exactly what Nick and his lady friend were looking for. However the music ended up putting them off, enough infact to leave empty handed!? Even though it had what they were looking for, mental.
   
   

   

   A healthy raver, worried about second hand smoke.

   
   We stumbled into Supre and she was impressed with the cheap selection on offer but It was also like being submerged in a weird tecnho-rave underworld. There was the repetitive, pumping bass lines and all that was missing was kids waving glow sticks and trying to eat the inside of their own cheeks. We left shell shocked and with no shopping bags – is that really a pleasurable shopping experience?
   
   Interestingly Britains most successful supermarket chain Tesco has a no music-policy,  "There is no irritating Muzak in Tesco's"  An article from The Telegraph
   
   
3. It can be hard for staff to always get the music selection right. A lot of staff, particularly in restaurants and bars are assigned the task of ipodding an appropriate playlist. Nick's views on this:
   
   
   By no means is it an easy task to come up with 3+ hours of music that isn’t going to offend or bore the customers, yet keep all the staff happy and not make them think you’re an over indulgent muso-w***er. Restaurant music should blend into the background. It should be a social aid, an intermediary to dissolve those awkward moments when the conversation runs dry.
   
   Wise words, infact 80% of people say like to hear music when they eat out, for more restaurant stats click here
   
   
4. 

   Rihanna.......

One more thing. Whilst I am in a pub, or shop, or restaurant... I do not. I repeat not, want to hear Rihanna singing ‘come on rude boy can you get up, come on rude boy boy can you get it up’... There is not one place on this planet that I want to hear about erectile dysfunction. Besides, we all make bad choices and brewers droop is a genuine, plausible medical condition. Leave me alone, I was TIRED. 

What else is overplayed? for opinions from young opinionated internet people click here

Pt.2 is less angry